Splice Review

I dare you, as the reader, to think of a movie where science is tampered with, where the natural order of things, the mysteries of god or the universe or whatever, is mucked with, and humanity comes out the better for it. Society is advanced, people live better, we grow wings (or better yet, JETPACKS!), and peace is achieved with little bloodshed and viscera. I will guess your answer. Ready?

Your answer is “None”.

You couldn’t think of anything, could you? I’m not surprised. Most, if not all of the time in a movie, when a scientist is trying to unlock the secrets of creation itself, nature looks right back at them, gives them the finger, and turns them inside out in the most hideous, painful, and graphic way possible.

Splice continues the grand tradition of Mother Nature bitch-slapping up off our pedestal and reminding us that it’s not nice to try to sneak a peek underneath her dress. In it, Adrien Brody and Sarah Polley play two rock-and-roll geneticists, Clive and Elsa (award yourself 5 bonus points now if you catch the sly nod to Bride Of Frankenstein here), who work for a pharmaceutical company that is using their work in splicing together different animals into freaky, fleshy, living mounds to get to game-changing proteins. Clive and Elsa are fully in love and full of themselves, thanks to their cocky natures and the fame they’ve found as splicers. During their latest trial of creating male and female flesh balls named Fred and Ginger, the two find out that their department is being reconfigured to accelerate the work in an attempt to turn more profit out of the research and experimentation. Not liking their autonomy and the hope of unlocking ways to help their fellow man being taken away, Elsa decides to jump the moral barricade of human cloning and impulsively impregnates a donor egg with the DNA stew that created Fred and Ginger to see if the couple’s work could benefit mankind. Clive is unsure of the decision, more due to the legality of it than the moral question, but like any good scientist who blares rock music and wears catchy t-shirts, he relents under the infallible logic of “Let’s see what happens, what could go wrong?”

Thus, the two secretly bring the species into the world, in the messiest and most dangerous way

possible. It rapidly goes from amorphous meatsack to something that resembles a hairless kangaroo/cat/peach composite. Clive wants to destroy the creature after it attacks Elsa during the birthing process, but Elsa’s motherly instincts and curiosity prevent him from euthanizing it. Soon, it becomes apparent that the creature is rapidly evolving, and the couple decide that, since the creature will live out it’s lifetime in a matter of months, they’ll might as well study it in secret. Elsa begins to try to educate the creature, which leads her to name the female Dren, further bonding with the creature. As they raise Dren and she begins to take shape as a freakish animal-child, the couple find it more and more difficult hiding their new experiment from their coworkers and bosses, including Clive’s own brother, and focusing on their work. Soon, they find themselves slipping up and decide the best thing to do is to take Dren to Elsa’s abandoned farmhouse, which stands as a bleak reminder of the (possibly) horrifying childhood Elsa endured. As the child grows more and more into a woman, Elsa and Clive begin to drift further and further apart. After all, it’s tough enough taking care of a human child. Taking care of a animal/human hybrid child who goes from Dora The Explorer to Miley Cyrus to tearing a rabbit apart with it’s teeth in the span of a few days can be hard on anyone.

From there, things predictably spiral out of control, as Elsa and Clive try to figure out what to do with their new "creation" as Dren ages and matures and, of course, changes. Underneath all of the veneer of science gone awry, the dicey question of genetic splicing and cloning, and the traditional "What Hath God Wrought" hand-wringing that comes along with all that, Splice is, at it's core, a story of a family coming together and just as quickly, exploding apart. There is a brief conversation about bringing a child into the world early in the movie, and it resonates through the whole film. Clive wants one, Elsa isn't crazy about it. Not surprising, since her childhood was hardly a happy one. But when they drop Dren into their laps, Elsa takes a shine to her, perhaps finally seeing a chance to raise someone the way she never got a chance to be raised. Unfortunately, like most mothers in similar situations, not everything goes as planned. It's made doubly hard for the couple, because not only are they tried as sudden parents, they're tried as scientists. Dren is an entirely new species of their own making, but not of their own control. Things are made more complicated when Dren becomes sexually aware, and, without spoiling anything, it doesn't end well. On top of all this, the two geneticists see their life's work almost literally blow up in their face, as their attempts to balance a work life and family life take their toll in a gruesome introduction of their other prized work. Soon, things go completely south for this Nucleus Family, and Dren lashes out at the couple, like any teenager would. All of this leads to a shocking third act that could leave you with your jaw on the floor.

Vincenzo Natali, he of the confusing but brilliantly shot and plotted Cube, puts together a good, albeit fairly predictable vision of why messing around with the mysteries of life might not be a good idea. He also puts together a good story about two people who should not be parents suddenly becoming parents, and makes it work with the sci-fi and horror premise. He gets the most out of Brody and Polley, who have a weird chemistry together. You almost can't buy them as a couple, but because they frequently seem so selfish, conflicted with each other, and confused over the steps to take with Dren, they actually play off of each other perfectly. Polley gets the most out of her character, a bruised but confident woman, self-assured about her work until the opportunity to create and raise Dren presents itself, then a whole new set of issues come to the surface. Brody does his best to play the concerned conscience who eventually slides into the madness that he helped create, and holds his own well. Both play the dynamic nerd card to the hilt, and wear it well. But the real revelation here is French actress/model Delphine Chanéac, who plays Dren. Tasked with having to communicate her character with only her body language and facial expressions (Dren only communicates with animalistic clicks and gutteral moans), Chanéac turns in a role that goes from innocent to monstrous to sexual to confused, and back again to monstrous, all while under amazing makeup from Howard Berger and Greg Nicotero's team at KNB EFX, and impressive CGI from the group at C.O.R.E. Digital Pictures. Chanéac's gives a childlike, heartbreaking performance and comes very close to doing what Karloff did best for the Frankenstein's Creature...make you feel terrible for the situation the creature finds itself in that it can't quite figure out. She should see quite a fanbase form around her work from this movie, and rightly so.

It's impressive that Natali was able to get this movie in theaters, much less made. It's just refreshing to see a fairly mature, yet still shocking horror/sci-fi movie get a wide theater release under the glut of remakes and uninspired retreads. It doesn't help that it's released in the head-end of summer, and is bound to get lost in the Shrek-and-Iron-Man-slide that's hit theaters. But Splice stands as a great way to kick off yer shoes, put your prehensilated double-jointed feet up, grab a cool cup of DNA-reencoded liquid, and enjoy a little warm-weather spitting in God's eye!

And hey, worse comes to worse, it's only 3 less genetic mistake freaks short of being Sex And The City 3!